Ordinary Words Extraordinary Power, A Dictionary of Distinctions, Danish Ahmed,

Sent: Oct 9, 2002
Subject: DoD: Special Thanksgiving Issue

Welcome to the Distinctions e-Zine...
Ordinary Words ~ Extraordinary Power (TM)

“When you sleep with someone, your body makes a promise whether you do or not.” – Cameron Diaz, Vanilla Sky
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Word on the Street was a huge success!
A full day of smiling faces, interesting people, and loving family and friends. With a strong presence in both Toronto and Vancouver, we made lots of contacts and had lots of people subscribe to THIS Distinctions e-Zine! Word on the Street is a national book fair that celebrates literacy and the printed word. Follow this link to see a large image of our booth http://www.dictionaryofdistinctions.com/word.jpg.
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Balance & Integration
“No single element of our life can really be fully developed without developing other elements.” – A Dictionary of Distinctions, Page 36
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Happy Thanksgiving! :)
Gratitude & Thanks

I really admire your dedication in reading through this newsletter. It gives meaning to my life that other people can appreciate my experiences and ideas. I truly hope that this is making a difference in your life and opening you to new ways of being and communicating. You are in a select group of people who want to improve their lives and are willing to exert effort to make things happen.
Notice that I didn’t say “thank-you” or “thanks?” Raymond Aaron, a professional speaker in Canada, says that one of the qualities in being successful is appreciation. His twist, however, is to remove the word “thank you” from our vocabulary. What a powerful idea!
Saying thanks often gives us a short-cut in life. It allows us to say two words to express gratitude, but these two words are so over-used in our daily living that people don’t make anything of it. We thank people for everything! If someone says, “How are you?” we say, “Fine. Thank You.” We must hear hundreds of “thank-you’s” everyday. With that many, a “thank-you” has very little value.
When we eliminate those two words, we force ourselves to really think about what we want to show gratitude for. We become more expressive and describe what the other person has done that we appreciate. That is sincere. That is authentic. When people hear that, they feel special. When people hear that, they want to do more.
This is not to say that we should eliminate the two words from our vocabulary all together. We could be self-expressive and genuine, and say “thank-you” at the end. However, the exercise of not having those words readily available helps us to become more expressive. It’s a wonderful practice.
Let’s have an attitude of gratitude. That’s a cliché many people think is important, yet don’t necessarily practice to its full extent. When we are expressing gratitude, let’s think about what we’re saying. Let’s express our feelings. Let’s deliver acknowledgment. Let’s not stop at a “thank-you.”
In Australia, a quick thank-you is often expressed as a “ta.” That’s right, “ta.” I was startled when I first heard that. However, that cultural twist does make a difference. In small scenarios of appreciation, a “ta” does suffice. And, when a “thank-you” is being used, it is valued at a higher level. What an excellent example of how a single word can make such a profound difference in communication.
A French proverb says, “Gratitude is the heart’s memory.” When expressing gratitude, don’t think. Just feel what your heart already knows.
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Our Bodies
“The market price of a crash-test dummy is now $200,000. How much is your body worth?” – Danish Ahmed
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Reaching for #1
After only four weeks on BookSurge, "A Dictionary of Distinctions, Second Edition" has made it to best-sellers list! Follow this link to see http://www.booksurge.com/bestseller.php3.
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Being Present
“Usually, we try to logic ourselves into changing what we’re thinking about, rather than just changing what we’re thinking about. The latter is a lot easier, and a lot less stressful.” – Danish Ahmed
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Professionally Speaking...

"Distinctions in Goal Setting"
Bank of Nova Scotia
Scotia Plaza (Toronto)
Tuesday, November 5, 2002, 12:00 PM

"Distinctions in Communication: Untapped Value in Business"
bConscious Networking Forum
The Grand Hotel on Jarvis, near Dundas (Toronto, Canada)
Thursday, November 21, 2002, 7:00 PM
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Understanding
“We lose our freedom to understand when we bring up the barrier of discretion.” – Danish Ahmed
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(C) Copyright Ordinary Words Inc., 2002

Sent: Sept 5, 2002
Subject: 9-11, Interdependent Goals

Welcome to the Distinctions e-Zine...
Ordinary Words ~ Extraordinary Power (TM)

“Urgency is the outcome of our criteria. Urgency is only such based on importance, interest, excitement, passion, profitability, relatedness, or whatever else we choose.” – Danish Ahmed
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Distinctions from 9-11
September 11, 2001 was a historic day for all of us. As the anniversary of that date approaches, we can’t help but sadly recall the events, the tragedy and the great human toll that was extracted. However, this is also a good time to reflect on the eloquent response of President George W. Bush and the positive message that he imparted. In his speech to Congress, the American People and global citizens, he said:
“We will rally the world to this cause by our efforts, by our courage. We will not tire, we will not falter, and we will not fail.”
While the words “tire,” “falter,” and “fail” may merely seem like repetitive jargon to create emotional emphasis or poetic harmony, they actually contain a significant depth of communication.
We will not tire. This has to do with our efforts. This has to do with our persistence. This has to do with our perseverance. This word expresses our consistent actions to attain our cause.
We will not falter. This has to do with our competence. This has to do with our intelligence. This has to do with our wisdom. This word expresses our resourcefulness to attain our cause.
We will not fail. This has to do with our conviction. This has to do with our determination. This has to do with our confidence. This word expresses our faith in attaining our cause.
As we can see, there’s a depth of meaning in just three distinct words. They were wisely chosen.
We live in a world where effective communication is vital in sustaining peace and understanding amongst all global citizens. George W. Bush delivered these words with pride and elegance, but more importantly, with distinction. “We will not tire, we will not falter, and we will not fail.”
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Remembering Moments Powerfully
“It doesn’t matter which moments we remember. What matters is that we remember our moments powerfully.” – Danish Ahmed & Steve Rogers
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Time Sensitive Goals & Interdependent Goals
The “T” in the SMART goal formula represents time-sensitivity. That is, our goals should have a specific date associated to them.
However, there are two kinds of dates that can be associated with a goal. The first may be obvious. This is a hard date. A hard date is a calendar date denoting a specific moment in time. We strive to attain our goals, a specific measurable result, by this moment in time.
The second kind of date is a reward-associated date. This is a dynamic moment in time that is represented by another achievement. For example, I have a goal of going to Amsterdam for a vacation. Rather than having a hard date associated to it, I have a dynamic date. That is, I will go to Amsterdam on a vacation once I get out of debt. So, one goal (the goal of going to Amsterdam) is dependent on me achieving another goal (the goal of getting out of debt). This is a powerful tool, because one goal reinforces another goal. (Note that the independent goal may have a hard date, causing the dependent goal to have an implicit hard date.)
Now here’s something really cool! How about we make some of our goal dates dependent on the achievement of SOMEONE ELSE’S goals. In other words, the achievement of our goal PRESUPPOSES the achievement of someone else’s goal. Here’s an example. Steve Rogers is currently working on creating electronic interactive media for Ordinary Words Inc. (with no immediate compensation). His goal is to make money from this endeavor. Him making money from media for Ordinary Words Inc. presupposes that Ordinary Words Inc. will make money from these mediums. Since a time investment is needed on the part of Ordinary Words Inc. to yield a profitable return, an interdependent relationship is thus created.
Of course, we just can’t choose anyone to have interdependent goals with. They must be a very good friend, someone who we can really trust and someone who is really determined to reach their goals. An ideal partner for interdependent goal setting is, of course, our significant other.
For more information on interdependency, please read A Dictionary of Distinctions chapter: “Dependence, Independence & Interdependence.”
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“The consistency of goal-setting is what creates the momentum needed for success.” – Danish Ahmed
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Professionally Speaking...

St. Marks Pres. Church
1 Greenland Road (Don Mills/Lawrence, Toronto)
Thursday, September 12, 2002, 7:00 PM

"International Community Development" - Canada World Youth
Weekend of Active Involvement in Volunteering
Metro Hall (King/John, Toronto)
Friday September 13 to Sunday September 15, 2002

Queen's Park
14 Carlton St., 2nd Floor (Toronto)
Wednesday, September 18, 2002, 6:00 PM
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“A lack of faith is what causes us to live day-to-day rather than designing our lives.” – Danish Ahmed
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(C) Copyright Ordinary Words Inc., 2002

Sent: July 27, 2002
Subject: DOD: Thought, Reality & SMART Distinctions

Welcome to the Distinctions e-Zine...
Ordinary Words ~ Extraordinary Power (TM)

“‘Stuff’ happens to everyone. Those of us who are living ordinary lives interpret the ‘stuff’ as bad luck, unfortunate circumstances, or a foul word. Those of us who are on a mission, with a specific goal or destination for our lives, see the ‘stuff’ as merely obstacles that must be overcome. Our disposition to life determines our interpretation.” – Danish Ahmed
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Thought & Reality
When we let other people’s thought patterns be part of ours, we’re not completely in control. Thought is what creates reality, and in order to create the reality we want, we have to have just our thoughts.
Let me explain. Dr. Wayne Dyer speaks a lot about this. He says, although the universe is made out of matter, what really “matters” is thought. Thought controls and shapes everything. Our entire reality is based on our thoughts. Dr. Dyer proves this in many ways (which I don’t have time to go into right now.)
So, let’s not be affected by other people’s thoughts as they might negatively impact us. Let’s not allow other people’s opinions, ideas, comments, judgments or assessments of ourselves affect us.
You may be thinking (and notice that you’re “thinking”) that we live in world where we must interact with others, and therefore we cannot survive if we don’t consider how others might feel about our actions. True. There is a line of discretion as there is with all philosophies. And, as with all philosophies, it is the conscious understanding of choice that gives us power. Choose to take on other people’s thoughts, or choose not to, based on the situation. But by all means, let us do so with conscious choice.
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“Let’s authentically accept the past and completely trust the future, for only then can we truly be living in the present.” – Danish Ahmed
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Some SMART distinctions.
Goals should be written down and have the following SMART attributes:
Specific. We need to have hard numbers on our goals. However, this is not to be confused with being “precise.” It’s ok to have ranges of numbers. In fact, it’s better for the subconscious mind if we have a “minimum,” “target,” and “outrageous” goal set. That way, we have both the advantage of setting a high goal that we would love, and still be excited if we only achieve our “minimum.”
Measurable. This is so we will know whether our goals are being achieved or not. This is not to be confused with being “comparable.” Sometimes we set goals and then check and see how our friends, who may have similar goals, are doing. Goals are not meant to be compared with others. We want to compare our achievements with our own past.
Affirmative and Action-oriented. Our minds don’t like to stop old habits, but love to create new habits. This doesn’t mean that we need to be “achieve”-oriented and that all our goals should help us be more productive or successful. Goals can be about taking time off, having fun, living, laughing, and enjoying life.
Realistic. The subconscious mind will reject goals that are not realistic. However, “realistic” is not the opposite of “optimistic.” We can have optimistic goals that are also realistic. In fact, these are the best types of goals to have.
Time-sensitive. Without a due date, we would never return a book to the library. Note that “time-sensitive” doesn’t mean “time-constrained.” We’re allowed to go back to the library and borrow the same book again. So, let’s not feel guilty if we haven’t achieved a goal in a particular time-period. Let’s reset the goal and go for it again.
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“Communication is using your mind to discover your soul.” – Danish Ahmed
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Professionally Speaking...

“Summer Resolutions” by Danish Ahmed
Breakfast Television, CityTV
Monday, July 29, sometime between 7:15 to 8:40 AM

"Career Development & Entrepreneurship" by Danish Ahmed
Location TBA (Atlanta, Georgia)
Tuesday, August 27, 2002, 6:30 PM
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“Listening from nothing is a great first step because it allows us not to have any inaccurate thoughts or assumptions about the other person’s situation. Listening from everything is better, because that allows us complete access to the other person’s world.” – Danish Ahmed & Steve Rogers
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(C) Copyright Ordinary Words Inc., 2002

Sent: July 14, 2002
Subject: DoD: The Secret of Success!!!

Welcome to the Distinctions e-Zine...
Ordinary Words ~ Extraordinary Power

“In the movie ‘Training Day’ we heard a common phrase: ‘It’s not what you know, it’s what you can prove.’ That’s why it’s important not only to learn, but then to teach what we’ve learned to others. This insures our ability to prove what we know.” – Danish Ahmed
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The Key To Networking...
I’m so excited because I know there’s going to be a technology in the future where we will all be able to get in touch with everyone we have ever met. In fact, this is possible today if the next generation is willing to take note of everyone’s e-mail address, and update them periodically. Now imagine a future where we remember someone from our past that we want to get in touch with, and we can - it’s possible, instantaneously. We create such a large network of people that we know in our life, that the whole concept of networking increases exponentially such that people are accomplishing a lot more. People are being a lot more productive, as they should, since they have a bigger “human resource” department to draw from. Society is gaining so much, because everyone trusts each other.
Isn’t that what networking is? We trust someone from our past or via an association. That’s why most of us don’t talk to strangers. We could be talking to strangers on the street and networking with them, but we lack the initial trust.
Now back to our possible future. When we start having trust with so many other people in the world, what type of community will be created? Eventually, there will be no strangers. Just people who are 4 or 5 degrees of separation away from us, rather than 1, 2, or 3.
So there are really two keys here. Firstly, live in this future and stay connected to people, if only by e-mail. It doesn’t matter how well we “hit it off” because people change. Whom we don’t like that much today, we may love tomorrow. Heck, we may even be losing a potential spouse! Staying in touch is easy and it’s worth it. Secondly, learn to talk to strangers. This is where network marketing takes the cake. They really teach us how to do this effectively and it is so worthwhile. We teach our kids not to talk to strangers for good reason. But we somehow grow up as adults not wanting to talk to strangers either. What a waste! You know, strangers can only stay strangers for about 30 seconds.
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“There’s a roadblock that we face when learning a new language. We get stuck in a particular place because we don’t understand the cultural context. That’s what happens when we confine our learning to be from a dictionary, rather from distinctions.” – Danish Ahmed
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The Secret of My Success
Everyone tries to communicate their particular “secret.” And here’s mine:
I always thought I was committed. I put in 100%, I go all out. Then, I sit back and wonder what the true “secret” is that gets others to succeed? Every great speaker talks about it. We must come to a point where we will not be denied our dream. I, and probably most others, think we understand this, especially at first. We keep trying, and trying, and trying, and we don’t give up.
But what I’ve discovered this secret truly means is that we don’t even bother to figure out what we’re going to do as a backup plan if we don’t succeed (and especially when it gets too tough). Some people might think this is crazy - I know I did. But it really makes the difference. When we come to realize that no matter what happens, we’re going to break-through whatever obstacles come our way because of our relentless commitment, that’s when we succeed. We’ll always use a back-door if we create one.
Marianne Williamson talks about the Hollywood story of an actress whose mentor says “Don’t wait to be discovered by a producer. Produce yourself.” Success isn’t about waiting to find the “secret.” The secret is, to produce ourselves into our success.
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“When asking someone about an experience they had, don’t just ask them to tell you what happened, ask them to tell you the emotions and feelings they experienced.” – Danish Ahmed
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Professionally Speaking...

“Spontaneously Speaking” by Danish Ahmed
YMCA on Grosvenor Street, near College (Toronto, Canada)
Wednesday, July 24, 2002, 6:00 PM
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“Don’t underestimate the power of hugging. Communication is verbal, visual, and physical.” – Danish Ahmed
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(C) Copyright Ordinary Words Inc., 2002

Sent: June 14, 2002
Subject: DoD: Beginning of Power; Your FREE Book

Welcome to the Distinctions e-Zine...
Ordinary Words ~ Extraordinary Power

“I checked out [Danish’s] website and just left amazon.com. I can’t wait to receive [the] book. I haven’t been that excited in a long time to make a purchase.” – Amber Vance, Pharmaceuticals, Greenville, North Carolina
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The Beginning of Power
Power. To distinguish what I mean by power, I must tell you firstly what I don’t mean. Power is not bad. Power does not corrupt. The power that most people think of when we use the word “power” is something hungry rich people strive for when their striving for money becomes too easy. I don’t think most people do that, but even if there are people who do do that, then that’s not power they’re seeking, that’s control. And that’s not what we’re talking about.
How are we ever going to become “powerful” people if subconsciously we have a value system that tells us power is evil? It won’t happen. But do you want to live your life fully and powerfully? If you do, then we have to recreate that word. So what is true power?
Power is having the ability to choose. Most of us don’t exercise that ability. We become complacent in whatever rituals we have day-to-day and wallow in our own mediocrity of life. When you, or I, or people we know live in a paradigm where we choose our lives, we create power. If we all exercise that choice, doesn’t that make for a powerful community? When everybody chooses, everybody wins. It’s not a “power struggle.” We can all choose, we can all choose different things, in fact, and we can all still be powerful.
Scott Michael says “The Will To Win, Springs from the Knowledge that You Can Win.” So what gets us to the momentum of having and causing choice, is the simple fact of knowing that we do have choice. That’s what most other motivational speakers do. They give you stories of how other people succeeded, despite the odds, through their knowledge and their choices. What they are doing is bringing to us the knowledge that the Choice is there. We can exercise the same choices that other people exercised - and get the same rewards that other people got.
Anyone can give us all the tools, techniques, methodologies, or technologies to transform our lives. But until we choose a different direction for our lives than the one we’re currently on, none of those things can do anything! Choice always has to come first. And that’s why the beginning of power is Choice.
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“Keep your shoulder to the wheel, your nose to the grindstone, your ear to the ground, which of course is a very hard position to work in.” – Jerry Meadows
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Manage Your State, or Utilize Your State
Managing your state is having the ability to control your body, thoughts, and emotions at a given time. For example, our best friend died last week, and now we need to give a job interview. Well, we need to manage our state and be effective in the interview. We can do this by generating ourselves in a certain way that causes our body, thoughts, and emotions to be 100% focused on the interview. And lots of personal development programs teach us how to do this (NLP is probably one of the best programs for this).
Those technologies are great. But there are times when we should just use Gestalt Therapy. That is, be with our emotions. Just let it all through. Let’s not force ourselves to be a certain way all the time. Yes, there are times we need to suppress, control, or generate our way of being. But when we get a chance, let it all out. Let’s not keep it all in our bodies, for it just gets out more slowly, in other ways, and in ways we may not like.
There are times to feel good and there are times to feel bad. I cried and screamed for 20 minutes last weeks because I was frustrated at my lack of success. But as my tears released the poison from my body, afterwards, I was on top of the world again. Like Chumbawamba says, “I get knocked down, but I get up again.” The secret is not keeping ourselves up; the secret is getting back up when we’re down (or once we’re “finished” being down).
This is called my “Feel Bad Strategy.” One important cheviot, however, is never to make any decisions when we’re feeling bad. When we feel bad, we’re usually in place where we want to do something drastic. If we were in more of a powerful place, we may not want to do something so drastic. So let’s keep our decision making exercises to the times when we feel good.
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“Don’t try to speed it up, or slow it down. Just be with the ride. And if the ride is good, extend the moment.” – Danish Ahmed
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Free E-Book: “7 Sizzling Secrets of Self-Made Millionaires”
http://milliondollartips.com/ebook.exe
(Distributed by written permission from the publishers)
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“When we live in possibility and then allow the universe to choose, we truly cannot have any regrets even if the universe didn’t create our possibility, for at least we know that we have already experienced the possibility we were seeking anyway.” – Danish Ahmed
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All contents (c) Copyright Danish Ahmed, Ahmed Enterprises, and/or affiliated companies, 1999-2002
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Sent: May 29, 2002

Welcome to the Distinctions Newsletter...

“I believe every person has a heart, and if you can reach it, you can make a difference.” – Uli Derickson, Flight Attendant on hijacked TWA flight 847
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Hear an audio sample of me!
The Foundation of Wisdom - http://www.Dictionary
—

The Best Friend

Our best friend is the person who knows the most about us and our lives. We may have friends in different communities of our lives (e.g., health club, education, work, family, church) where we only talk about that particular community, or very little else. However, a best friend is someone who knows about our involvement in every single one of the communities that we are involved in on an intimate level.
A best friend is a very important person to have in our lives because that person knows the entire context and content of our lives. If something new happens in our life, the first person we are likely to tell is our best friend. This is because our best friend will have the most information and experience to draw from in order to give us the best response. And it is in these moments in particular (when we have something new happen in our lives) that we make use of a best friend.
It’s great to be a social bud and have lots of great friends. But don’t underestimate the value of a truly good, best friend.
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“Some people are disturbed by those tough days because all they have is the days. They haven't designed or described or defined the future.” Jim Rohn
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Professions from Education

Our education system is great in giving us general knowledge that we can apply in all sorts of disciplines. However, I believe there is very little effort put into really making us aware of the true variety of choices we have in creating a profession for ourselves.
For example, the following are very interesting professions that I never heard fellow students ever saying, “I want to be...”
A Publicist, An Importer/Exporter, A Flight Attendant, A Marine Biologist, A Massage Therapist, A Psychologist, A Literary Agent, A Booking Agent, A Network Marketer, A Real Estate Tycoon, A Farmer, A Seminar Trainer, A Hotel Manager, A Clown, A Management Consultant, A Sales Executive, A Restaurant Owner, A Chef, A Venture Capitalist, A Costume Designer, and literally thousands more.
All of these occupations are all wonderful and an important part of our society. Yet people find themselves here out of luck, networking, or being at the right place at the right time. They usually didn’t have a specific “dream” of being one of these things. Typically, it was a dream of being a Doctor, Lawyer, Nurse, Actress, or Teacher. What would our world be like if more people had legitimate dreams of being all the professionals that are, and will be, available to us?
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“The problem with a lot of people, why they don’t move ahead in the world, is because they always feel that they don’t have choice. They feel that this is it, and become complacent with themselves.” - Kevork Guerguerian
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All contents (c) Copyright Danish Ahmed, Ahmed Enterprises, and/or affiliated companies, 1999-2002

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Sent: May 21, 2002

Welcome to the Distinctions Newsletter...

What is the _source_ of cynicism?

Really. Think about it.

A good question Steve Rogers asked. I will be answering it in the upcoming distinction of Skepticism & Cynicism. First, here’s the status:

My web-site is up. Please visit it at http://www.DictionaryOfDistinctions.com. It’s the first version that’s live, so I would really appreciate it if all of you could offer sincere feedback. Anything from what looks good, and what could be added, to the new ideas, logos and interactive content. Please don’t hesitate to be brutally honest and blunt. You are the core team of people that will create who I am for the larger media.

I am now doing this full-time. I have hired a publicist and a marketing manager. We are currently working on trying to create a specific brand for me and identifying a target market. One idea is targeting the youth market, ages 18-30. What do you think? No other professional speakers specifically target this audience, maybe for a good reason. I think that I could really relate to this audience.

On the slow side, there are so many political games being played in the publishing industry. That’s why my book is still not available in retail stores. I’m trying to play the game, but it’s very difficult. The universe does come together for people who put out the right energy, though. A couple of weekends ago I met someone in an elevator in New Jersey and struck up a conversation. When I asked his name, he said “Charlie Jones.” I said, “Charlie ‘Tremendous’ Jones?” He said “Yes,” and I made a good contact. (Charlie facilitates “book orgies” and owns a publishing company dedicated to helping professional speakers.)

Life really works when you’re out there playing. Get on the field on life.

So what’s the source of optimism? Reading inspirational stories, for one.

Thanks for reading.